


Prepare for Launch: The Astronaut Training Process

by DJClawson



Series: Theodore Nelson's Adventures in Sharing a Workspace [35]
Category: Daredevil (TV), Doctor Strange (2016), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Closeted Character, Corporate Espionage, Endgame what Endgame, F/M, Gen, Hammer Industries, Hydra (Marvel), M/M, Recreational Drug Use, SHIELD, Spaceships, Thanos died in Wakanda in this timeline, everybody's still alive guys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:01:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25959469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DJClawson/pseuds/DJClawson
Summary: Once upon a time, Theo was a bit player in someone else's story.
Relationships: Matt Murdock/Theo Nelson
Series: Theodore Nelson's Adventures in Sharing a Workspace [35]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1202407
Comments: 24
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to LachesisMeg, who can somehow still concentrate on editing this nonsense during a pandemic.

When Theo heard the door chime, he looked at the clock. “Shit.” It was past six, but he’d forgotten to flip the sign or lock the front door. And he couldn’t bring himself to throw a customer out of the store just because of his own mistake, so he stayed at the register he was checking and said, “We’re closing up, but can I get you something?”

The man with the air of self-confidence that only a large ego and a ludicrously expensive suit could bring looked up at the menu. “I’ll have one of everything.”

“Look, if you want to impress me, just buy a few things and overtip. Don’t make me go through the whole stock,” Theo said, still focusing on his register to avoid staring too hard at his customer. “I didn’t know you superhero impersonators made that much. I thought the going rate for a photo was like, five dollars.”

The person who was absolutely, positively the real Tony Stark rolled his eyes. Theo knew that face well. He was much older and grayer than he had been when Theo was seventeen, when Stark was interviewed in Playboy with a photo spread that involved him surrounded by supermodels. It was the only copy of Playboy that Andy lent him that Theo had never given back. 

Stark got to the point. “Peter doesn’t know it, but there’s a tracker in his suit.”

“Aw, fuck,” Theo blurted out. He closed the register and took a moment before deciding what he wanted to say. “That’s gotta be illegal. He’s not even your kid! The last thing I need to learn is that Tony Stark is a creepy pedo guy.”

“It’s for his protection,” Stark said, with a little anger behind his words. 

“Kids shouldn’t need bulletproof suits that shoot lasers and help them survive leaving the atmosphere. They need some pamphlets on stranger danger and a ride to school.”

“Look, if I’m not allowed to make decisions about him, then you certainly aren’t,” Stark pointed out.

“Yeah, okay, you have a point.” Because he did. Theo gestured up to the menu. “What do you want?” Even though Stark obviously wasn’t here to eat.

“What’s good here? Cap says he likes the soup, but he eats a lot of soup.”

Theo was used to celebrities in his shop and was almost never phased by them. Also, Captain America was notoriously bad at not looking like he was a celebrity. He thought a baseball cap would do everything. “If you like your roast beef bloody, the cut we have in the fridge is really at its peak. Tomorrow it won’t be as good.”

“Roast beef on rye with Russian dressing,” Stark said, putting a hundred-dollar bill on the counter. “And your finest spirits.”

“We’re not licensed to serve alcohol,” Theo said, and gave him every penny of his change. “Can you flip the sign?” he asked as he pulled the roast beef out of the case. He was a professional. He could still serve Tony Stark, billionaire superhero and former crush, without freaking out. But maybe he needed a little whiskey to steady his hands, so he poured himself a glass before bringing the sandwich to the table and sitting down across from him.

Tony took a few bites. “I’ll give it to you - this is really good.” He wiped his hand on the napkin. “You have questions about why I’m here. I mean, aside from your excellent cuisine.”

“I know better than to implicate myself in anything,” Theo said, and took another swallow of Jameson. “And thanks. I do take pride in my work.”

“But you didn’t always want to be a butcher.”

“No,” he said, and left it at that.

“We could have used you at the office.”

“You only sent recruiters to brand-name schools.”

“You got into MIT. You just didn’t go.”

Theo supposed he should really be more bothered that Tony Stark knew absolutely everything about him. “Brooklyn College offered me a scholarship. We didn’t all get rich through war profiteering.”

“If you’d stayed at Hammer, you would have,” Stark said between bites. He was not kidding about enjoying his meal. 

“Oh,” Theo said. So that was this was about. Not good but - way better than it being about Matt. “Talking to you about that stuff would be the definition of corporate espionage. And I know you know about NDAs - that came out during the class-action sexual harassment lawsuit.”

“That was a long time ago,” Stark said, firm in his conviction. “I apologized to each of them individually and we gave them whatever they asked for. Not my best moments, okay, but like I said - it’s in the past.”

“That’s fair,” Theo said, regretting bring it up a little. But he remembered it because it really took the edge off his crush. “Anyway, you know I can’t talk about anything that may or may not have happened at Hammer. I basically sold them my soul and promised them my firstborn kid, and all I have is a cat. And they’re not getting her.”

“I can get Justin Hammer on my phone right now,” Stark said, undoubtedly serious. “He will relieve you of any sense of loyalty you have to your former employer.”

“Justin Hammer doesn’t know who I am.”

“Oh, he remembers you. Not your name, but what you did to him - yeah, that was memorable. People who want to get fired joke about it.”

Theo wished he could sink deep into his chair, and when he came back up, Stark would be gone. But that wasn’t how life worked. “Okay, so assuming I agreed to say anything, I don’t know why you would want to talk to me. He must know whatever you want to know. I was barely there and - statute of limitations here - stoned most of the time. I can’t possibly have information you need. Get it from him. Get it from my coworkers.”

“Your coworkers weren’t there, for the night in question,” Stark said. “Listen, kid - “

“I’m not a kid.” 

“ - This isn’t about me or Justin. Well, it is sort of about something he did. With you present. But this isn’t me coming to you with corporate interests. I’m just the errand boy for SHIELD.”

Theo doubted Stark was an “errand boy” for anyone, but he folded his arms and said, “I have to talk to my legal team.”

“We don’t really have time for that,” Stark explained. “Look, aside from Justin’s official sign-off on this - which you will get - what do you want? You need a not-very-demanding corporate partner? You want an Avenger to show up at your niece’s birthday party?”

Theo looked down at his feet, as if that would help him, and thought about it. All he knew at first was that he didn’t need Stark’s help to get a Avenger to show up at Mary’s birthday party. “I want to go to space.”

“What, you want to take a ride in the suit? Because I have a guest suit.”

“No, that sounds terrifying. I don’t even like rollercoasters. I would lose my shit in that thing. I want to go to space.”

“Space,” Stark repeated incredulously. 

“Yeah. Vacuum, no gravity, looking down at the Earth through the window. That space.”

“And you think - what, that I just _have_ a space station available?”

“That does sound exactly like something you would have.”

Stark sighed very theatrically. “How about being weightless? We can do that without leaving the atmosphere.”

Theo recrossed his arms and said. “I want to go to space.”

“You know, most people would do this for a selfie with their favorite Avenger.”

“I already have a personalized message from Thor on my boyfriend’s voicemail. If Peter can go to space - “

“Peter tagged along, which he shouldn’t have - “

“ - and you made him a suit in case that would happen, anyway, then this is my chance to go to space, so I’m taking it.”

Tony Stark was super dramatic about showing his annoyance in sounds and gestures. “You can’t tell anyone.”

“I’m totally telling everyone.”

“You realize I have tons and tons of blackmail on you, right? That’s why we’re even talking?”

But Theo just repeated, “I want to go to space.”

Stark leaned back and groaned. “Fine. But you can’t say _why_ you went.”

“If this is about my time at Hammer, I won’t want to.”

  
  
  
_Circa 2004_

“Theo!” Tim called out from across the room. “Lunch?”

G-d, yes. Theo wasn’t hungry, per se, and certainly not for another run to Chili’s, but it meant getting out of the office, and he would take just about any excuse to get out of the office. Being out of the office meant he didn’t have to answer his phone with the same ring as everyone else’s, or duck if his manager came by his cubicle to inevitably say something unhelpful and pointless that would only result in more busywork. So Theo fled with his coworkers to Chili’s, with their insufferable menu of low-quality, reheated chicken dishes and overpriced drinks. 

The waitress was always nice, though, and she remembered his order, so the crotons and dressings with egg in them almost never arrived with his salad. Sugar was his only real nutritional vice, and he dumped sugar packets into his iced tea. 

Since none of them could talk about any work they actually did in the office outside of the office, discussion inevitably drifted to office politics, promotion rumors, and complaints about their managers. They all seemed to answer to about three, more if they were on additional projects. 

As the youngest member of the group, Theo was supposedly the least jaded, but that hadn’t lasted long. He’d just expected his soul to last a little bit longer before being ground down, was all.

When he got back, Sharon was waiting for him. “Where have you been? I’ve been looking all over for you.”

She wasn’t mean, just harried. Theo tried to be nice to her - he tried to be nice to all of the women who probably got lots of shit because they were female engineers, and just being a female engineer put you in a special category where you weren’t considered quite as good as everyone else, and got tasked with rounding people up and running errands instead of actual engineering. 

“Lunch,” he told her. “Sorry. What do you need me for?”

“The boss wants to speak to you.”

Theo’s mind raced through all of the various things he could have fucked up, most of them paperwork related. There were just so many pointless forms. No one could keep track of them all, especially when they were trying to squeeze in real work. 

“Not Evans,” she said, meaning his primary manager. “McMann.”

“McMann? Why?” 

“Who knows? Maybe you’ll get onto one of his secret projects,” she said. 

It was worth trying. Anything to get him away from his cubicle and actual boss would be worth it. He went up to the executive floor and waited for half an hour in the lobby before he was ushered into one of those creepy windowless rooms they used for interviews. It was perfectly well-lit, with just a table and two chairs. Theo had spent a lot of time in one of them during onboarding, because Hammer Industries was nothing if not secretive and thorough. 

It was another twenty minutes before McMann actually entered, carrying Theo’s massive personnel file. Between his crew cut and the way he stood, everyone assumed he was ex-military, but no one was stupid enough to ask. 

“So,” McMann said with no preamble. “You wanted to be an astronaut.”

“Yeah, when I was a kid.” At this point, Theo was convinced there was nothing about his past that Hammer didn’t know about. “I used to make model rockets.”

“And you applied to work at NASA.”

“There was a hiring freeze.”

McMann opened the file but didn’t look at it. “You took courses on aerospace engineering, and your experience might be non-existent, but your technical knowledge is more up-to-date than a lot of the people at this site. I need you for a project.” He pulled out a set of familiar non-disclosure forms from the bottom of the pile, these ones labeled with a project number on it. 

“I don’t think I have any rights left to sign away.”

“And you’ll need to have fasting bloodwork. Come in tomorrow morning and the company nurse will take care of it. Nothing to eat or drink after midnight except water. Lots of water, makes your veins pop. And no smoking. Don’t think I don’t know about that.”

“Um, okay,” Theo said. He also knew better than to ask why they wanted bloodwork, or if he had a say in this. He supposed he could say no and not get fired, but there was no reason to do that. 

“Test results take a day or two, then my secretary will get back to you.” He snapped up the folder and banged it against the table. “And not a word of this to anyone.”

“Of course, sir.” 

McMann gave him the smallest of smiles before leaving him alone with the paperwork. 

  
  


Theo realized when he got a call from McMann’s administrative assistant that he was just teeniest bit excited. If anything, it would be a nice change of pace, assuming he hadn’t failed any drug tests (which, if they did, he definitely failed). He was promptly but politely instructed to go to another wing of the building and sign himself in at security. The guards there had to swipe him in because his keycard wasn’t activated for that wing. They didn’t make conversation as they walked past windows where Theo could see the new hanger building going up. Officially, it looked like an airplane hanger, but Hammer Industries didn’t make airplanes. Officially.

There were more double doors to go through and someone greeted him on the other side by saying, “Do you have any food on you?”

“No.”

“Because whatever you bring in, you can’t take back out again. Even a candy bar. No exceptions, okay?”

“Okay.” 

The next room was a locker room, where he was told to change into a white jacket and pants, and put a cap on his head. When it came to highly sensitive technology, a clean room wasn’t unusual, but he’d never been in one before. He was just glad his hair was so short now.

“There are all just legal precautions,” the guard or manager or whomever he was said. “You’re not going to get a serious level of radiation.”

“Radiation?” Theo asked as he was handled a bottle of pills and water. “What’s this?”

“Iodine. Again, this is just coming from legal. They have to cover their asses.”

Okay, now Theo was excited _and_ scared. They passed chemical showers on their way in to the laboratories, and finally Theo was left alone in a room with a glass case filled with metal shards. Some of them had been patched together, others merely set beside the matching pieces for reassembly, but no one had gotten very far. 

“Nelson,” McMann said as he entered, similarly attired. “Go ahead. You can open the case.”

Theo removed the latch and moved closer, wondering if he should be breathing over them.

“They’re not deadly,” McMann said. “Not unless you eat them. And Hammer generally frowns on consuming company property. Here.” He picked up a shard that had one letter of a logo in the corner and handed it to Theo. 

Theo took it in both hands. He felt a surge of what had to be static electricity, even though they weren’t standing on a carpet. The metal was discolored, and bad burn marks from an explosion. It was also too light to be anything but aluminum, but it wasn’t aluminum. And Theo didn’t know of any type of explosion that would give something a green metallic sheen.

Theo looked at the piece in his hands, then back at the pile. There had been multiple attempts to assemble it, but too many pieces were missing. 

“So?” McMann said. “What is it?”

It really could be anything. But from the burn marks, his answer was, “It is or was near a propulsion engine when it exploded.”

“Who made it?”

“Not us. I mean - not the U.S. Not Russia. Not China.” _Don’t say this is an alien spaceship don’t say this is an alien spaceship don’t say this is an alien spaceship Theo you’re gonna get yourself fired_ \- “I would say that the origin of this is unknown.”

“Can you keep that under your hat?”

Theo nodded. _Totally an alien spaceship_. “Can I ask where we acquired it?”

“You may not,” McMann said, but not too sternly. “There’s not enough here to rebuild it, obviously. Or even jerry-rig it. But that doesn’t mean we’re out of ideas.” He took the metal out of Theo’s hands and put it back in the case. “You can only work on this project two days a week. Legal says we have to limit exposure. The rest of the time, you’ll be back at your regular job, but I’ll pull you off whatever projects are getting in the way of this one. And I suppose I don’t have to tell you about the extra security here. Loose lips sink ships.”

“Of course not, sir.” Theo knew there was nothing in the world that could compel him do something that would get him kicked off this project. Whatever it was. 

“Then you’ll meet the rest of the team on Tuesday. And wash your hands!”

Nobody used the term “alien spaceship.” They didn’t even use the term “spaceship.” But that was totally what they were working on.

Theo’s life was _so cool_.

There were about ten billion questions Theo wanted to ask, almost all of them involving how Hammer Industries had acquired/stolen an alien spaceship and why they were trying to reverse-engineer it, but he didn’t ask anyone who would know. He probably didn’t even speak to people who would know. His coworkers were above him in that they’d worked at Hammer longer, but they all had the same level of security clearance, and on alternate days, they went back to their own divisions to work on other projects. Three days a week, Theo put up with the regular bullshit of being a low-level worker in an office not designed for or by engineers run by middle managers with MBAs. The rest of the time was working on redesigning a space ship. _Fuck_.

“How was your day?” his mother asked at the dinner table. He went two or three times a week so he didn’t have to cook. 

“Same ol’ same old,” he told her. Which was a lie, but if he showed too much sudden enthusiasm, he’d have to have the conversation about how he couldn’t talk about work again. He told them, but it didn’t always take. 

Well, it wasn’t as if lying to his mother was something new. 

“And I always thought there was nothing to do in Jersey,” his father said. “Foggy, finish your tofu. If your mother made it, then you have to eat it.”

It was the only thing left on Foggy’s plate, neatly pushed to the middle. “I don’t like tofu,” he said with all of the conviction of a sullen teenager who had nothing to truly be unhappy about.

“If _I_ have to eat it, then you have to eat it,” their father insisted, to which Mom slapped him on the shoulder. “Hey! I ate it, didn’t I?”

“It’s Theo’s fault,” Foggy whined.

Their mother had no time for this. “It’s one protein side. Your body can handle something nutritious from time to time.”

“I think it’s great, Mom,” Theo added. “It’s a winner.” She shot him a smile in return.

At least _that_ wasn’t lie.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have any prompts for this series, please let me know. I'm happy for the inspiration.

_ Present Day _

Stark did not give him a chance to prepare. Whatever this was about, SHIELD wanted shit done. Which was good because otherwise, Theo would have had time to get nervous. His mind still did a pretty good job of it as he got into Stark’s limo.

“Drink?” Tony asked after instantaneously pouring something brown into a crystal glass.

“Shouldn’t I be fasting or something?”

“We’re not going in a conventional ship,” Stark said, and saw Theo’s expression. “Hey, you didn’t specify how you wanted to go to space. And this will be faster.”

Theo accepted the glass and knocked back what might have been the most expensive drink of his life. It was better if he didn’t know. Tony held his in his shaking hand. Yeah, he definitely looked smaller in real life, even if his personality made up for it. He also looked permanently stressed. Maybe saving the world multiple times was wearing on him.

“Justin won’t be there. Absolutely refuses to help protect the world. It’s not really his style,” Stark said, but Theo doubted that was the reason. “He did send us to you, and when we get the information we need, you can go back to your life, which according to your SHIELD file involves a lot of interaction with other people with significant SHIELD files.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Stark leaned back and sipped. “I don’t care, really. I can understand why other people would want to be Avengers, and as long as they don’t steal my technology to do it, I suppose I can’t expect otherwise.”

“Not everything is about imitating you,” was not a line Theo ever expected to be saying to Tony Motherfucking Stark. “New York City has people who specifically care about the city.”

“Or just certain neighborhoods.”

“Yeah, most New Yorkers don’t drive anyway.” And he really, really did not want to be having this discussion. “We spend all of our money on rent. And occasionally rebuilding our neighborhood after it gets destroyed in some alien battle.”

“Oh, that was nothing compared to what Bruce did in Brooklyn,” Stark said, and it took a moment for Theo to realize that Stark was casually referring to the Hulk. Maybe they hung out after work. Tony finished is own drink as the car came to a halt. “Come on. Let’s get you spaced up.”

They stepped out and Theo said, “This isn’t the Avengers Tower.” He hadn’t been paying attention to the roads but he was pretty sure they were in the Village.

“Yeah. Like a said, shortcut.”

Theo briefly debated texting his last known whereabouts to someone as Tony hurried him through the door to what looked like a motherfucking  _ museum _ on the inside, the type with too many huge books that no one ever read. Like, the kind of place with artifacts on the walls and winding staircases. And of course, as soon as they walked in, Theo’s phone sputtered and died. He hoped that wasn’t permanent. 

“This is the guy,” Tony said to the man at the bottom on the stairway in a ridiculous like, karate gi or something. But colorful. “Mr. Nelson, meet Dr. Strange. Strange, this is Mr. Nelson.”

“Theo’s fine,” he said, and offered his hand to a guy he could understand why Stark would know, because he kind of looked like him. “Um, hi.” He didn’t not comment on the name, but he’d definitely heard it before. 

“Welcome,” Dr. Strange said, without explaining where they were. He had a golden amulet around his neck that Theo had  _ definitely _ seen before, but couldn’t place it. It would definitely be wrong to ask about it. “You worked with HYDRA?”

“That is  _ not _ what happened,” Theo responded indignantly. “I need to talk to my lawyer like, right now.”

Dr. Strange did a weird pause and then said, “I know it isn’t.”

“You have to stop doing that,” Stark insisted. He looked directly at Theo. “He has time powers and he uses them all of the time. Don’t play chess with him. Don’t even play Uno.”

“Is that how you paid for all of this?” Theo looked around. “Kept winning the lottery?”

“I was entrusted with the keeping of this Sanctum Sanctorum by my predecessor, the Sorcerer Supreme,” Strange said, which was exactly the sort of thing the people in Theo’s life now said to him. G-d his life was stupid. Strange pointed to a photograph of a bald woman in yellow robes with the same amulet.

_ Oh shit _ , Theo thought.  _ Isn’t that Mrs. Gao’s ex-girlfriend? _ It was really to his credit that he didn’t blurt it out. He remembered that she didn’t eat meat but she really liked egg salad. He hadn’t seen her in years so maybe something happened to her. Or maybe they just broke up. He definitely never asked though. “Okay, I believe you.”

“We need to get him to the Talos’s,” Stark said. “Which is probably better anyway because Fury wants to listen in.”

“I really don’t have much to say,” Theo could not emphasize enough. He still didn’t understand why he was here. He just really wanted to go to space. “I think you guys are overestimating my position at Hammer. I was basically an intern.”

“Interns are important,” Stark said. “Do the thing.”

Dr. Strange didn’t look thrilled to be taking orders from Tony Stark, but hewound up like he was going to punch someone and produced a spinning portal that Theo was actually pretty familiar with, but decided not to announce that he had at least one Facebook friend who could do that. Hell, SHIELD probably knew. But he’d never been  _ through _ one. 

“This is gonna be fine, right?” He needed assurance. “I’m gonna be fine?”

“I’m aware that if I don’t get you back in one piece, I’m going to have to deal with a lot of dangerous people,” Stark said, and pushed him through. One step he was on an expensive antique rug, and the next - a metal corridor. It was blue. It was underlit. The air was colder and less humid. The sound was weird.

He was in space.

Holy shit _ he was in space. _

Stark was right behind him. “C’mon kid we gotta - “

“Hey,” he said as he stared out the window. At the earth. He was looking at the motherfucking earth. “Give me a minute.”  _ We don’t all get to go to space like all the time holy shit that is beautiful _ . The glass window was not as cold as he thought it would be. Everything around him was - kind of normal? He wasn’t weightless. He wasn’t in a spacesuit. He was standing in a hallway, looking at planet Earth out a window probably no one bothered to look out very often. But there it was. The earth.

His phone turned back on. There was no service, obviously, he didn’t know why he thought there would be, and his hands were shaking as he took what would indisputably be a crummy picture of earth through a window. On an iPhone. An old iPhone, too. The camera wasn’t even up-to-date. 

“You cannot share that photo,” Stark said. 

“Totally gonna.”

Stark sounded resigned. “Just don’t make it your cover photo. No one will believe you.”

“Don’t care.” But his current cover photo was a picture of Sadie positioned at Luke’s baller desk at Harlem’s paradise, because Luke had gotten a kick out of taking her up there, so he probably wouldn’t change it. 

Okay, so maybe he wasn’t an astronaut. He wasn’t captain or crew of this ... ship-thingy. But it was damn sure as close as he was going to get. He took another photo - this time a selfie - and managed to get Stark in the background.

“Can I go on a spacewalk?”

“NASA doesn’t exactly know we’re up here,” was Stark’s answer to that, and he dragged him away and into a conference room. An alien conference room. It was definitely alien technology, because he didn’t recognize it, aside from the stuff that he did. 

“This is Mr. Nelson,” Stark said to the room. Other than Dr. Strange, there were two people he didn’t know - a guy in an eyepatch and a woman in a spacesuit with the American flag colors on it. Sort of. “He’s here to tell us whatever he knows.”

Theo tooked the offered seat across from the eyepatch guy who wasn’t introduced. “Um, sure. I mean, after Hammer signs off on it - “

Eyepatch guy hit a button, and a hologram came up in the middle of the room of a tiny Justin Hammer. He never really matched Stark in his flair, but he always tried. “I said not to call me.”

“Can you please assure Mr. Nelson that he has your company’s permission to discuss the events of the night in question?” eyepatch guy said. “Not that there’s anything left of it in any records.”

“I would like to remind you that this is all very alleged, Fury,” Hammer responded. “Hammer Industries would never do - “

“Hammer Industries would never do a lot of stuff that Hammer Industries does,” Stark said. “Like stealing technology from SHIELD. Or me.”

“You have no proof - “

‘Fury’ leaned forward. “Do I look like a guy who cares about proof?”

He did not.

“Fine.” Justin turned around, because apparently he could see them. “This is - oh wow. You look different.”

“Yeah, my new job has a different dress code,” Theo said. “Hi, Mr. Hammer. I need to know that you’re not gonna hold me to the NDAs. I did take that stuff seriously when I signed it.”

“Unfortunately, not everybody did,” Hammer replied. “You’re good to go. And this conversation never happened.” He hit something to his right and the hologram cut off.

“Can we get down to business?” the woman in the spacesuit said. “Hammer stole a Kree ship. You were working on it.”

“I didn’t know what it was called.” He had so many follow-up questions that he was not going to be able to ask. “And they didn’t tell me where they got it. They just needed a guy with a fresh engineering degree on the project and made it clear that I couldn’t ask questions.”

“And you haven’t had any contact with Hydra since you left your job?” Fury asked.

“I didn’t know they were HYDRA! And I didn’t what HYDRA was!” Theo said defensively. Very defensively. “I was just a generic lab tech to them. Why don’t you ask McMann?”

“McMann’s dead,” Fury replied. “He wasn’t a generic lab tech to them.”

Theo swallowed. This was not anything he wanted to be involved with. Or had wanted to ever be involved with. He quit Hammer to avoid this very situation. But he also hadn’t called the police or the FBI or anything - he took the coward’s way out. And he still felt bad about it. “What do you want to know?”

“Human memory is a tricky thing,” Dr. Strange said. “But we can get around it.”

“What, you’re going to suck out my memories with a tube?”

“No, it’s much safer with magic,” Dr. Strange explained. “And you’re not going to lose anything.” He added, “Trust me. I’m a neurologist.” 

Theo looked at him with an expression that was definitely questioning his sanity, but Dr. Strange took it stride. “This isn’t going to hurt.” He made a little circle that looked like a hologram with his hand, and Theo was about to say that that’s what people said before it did, hurt, but - 

_ Circa 2004 _

Theo was back in his neatly-pressed shirt and slacks, looking at the New York skyline from across the Hudson. He reached up and his hair - well, it was basically gone. He felt bald even though he did have an inch of growth. 

“Are we in the past?” he asked when he realized Dr. Strange was hoving nearer to him. 

“No. We’re in your memory of the past. You can’t change anything. Everyone around you will perceive you exactly as you remember them perceiving you. And they can’t hear me.”

Damn, his fancy loafers felt awful. They squeezed his feet. People passed by him to enter the building as if he wasn’t talking to a floating wizard. “Do I have to go through the whole day?”

“No, we’ll speed through it as soon as you get your bearings. Until the encounter in question.”

“Can we stop before the very end? I don’t want you to see that.”

Dr. Strange paused, then said, “Tony Stark has requested to see everything.” Another pause, and then, “He said there’s a c-note in it for you.”

Theo held up his middle finger. “Can he see this?” He really didn’t need Tony Stark seeing the lowest moment of his professional career. 

“Our ability to observe is the point,” Dr. Strange said.

Ah, well, shit. He didn’t remember what he did that day. Probably set some program to compile on his computer and got high in janitor’s closet.

It was bizarre, watching himself within himself going through all of the motions, including saying hello to the security guards and his colleagues before sitting down at his cubicle, with the now gigantic-looking computer monitor. 

“Can I write down some stocks?” he asked Strange.

“It won’t change anything,” Dr. Strange said, sounding a little impatient. “This is your memory of the past, not the past. Do you feel settled?”

“Yeah. I guess so.”

The movement around him sped up considerably, and he saw himself going through what must have been the same motions of the day - which yes, did involve him shoving his paperwork aside and lighting up in janitorial, where the guy there was happy to let him as long as he shared when asked. He didn’t get high on his memory, which was probably for the best. 

He was in his late-afternoon funk of watching the clock tick down while trying not to look stoned in his cubicle when time slowed down to normal, and McMann came in. By now, most of the cubicles were empty, and Theo actually had his backpack (he still didn’t have a proper briefcase) out and ready to go.

“Nelson,” McMann said. “I need you for something.”

He looked conspicuously at the clock. “I have to make the train.”

“You can take a later one,” he insisted. “Unless you’re too tired from your long day of getting serious work done, and not wasting company time.”

He knew. He always knew. Not that the smell didn’t give Theo away no matter how much spray-on deodorant he used. “Okay,” Theo said. “But I do have to make  _ a _ train.”

By the time they got to the appropriate wing, most of the people were gone and a lot of lights were off. 

“You don’t have to do anything,” McMann said, and actually straightened Theo’s labcoat. “Just stand there and look smart. And do whatever Justin says to do.”

“Wait - Justin  _ Hammer? _ ” Because he’d never actually met the guy. Being in an auditorium during a company-wide meeting so Hammer could strut in front of his employees and generally not be as cool as Tony Stark didn’t count. 

“Yes. And keep your mouth shut. You’re background noise.”

The lab was completely devoid of people when they entered. McMann went right past the main case, which was covered for the night, and to the auxiliary room - the one with the weapons. They didn’t work well, and Theo didn’t like them. Hammer Industries insisted they were not currently in military weapons development. They hired people like Theo, who wanted to make things to go to Mars. But he wasn’t an idiot, either. McMann put a laser rifle in Theo’s hands. 

“I don’t know how to use this,” Theo said. “I’ve never actually tested it.” The  _ why don’t you do it? _ Was implicit, he thought. 

His boss fired it up and flipped one of the knobs in the back. “Safety. On. Off. Leave it on.”

“These aren’t safe,” Theo said. “We don’t understand the voltage yet. They fail all the time.” It was hard to work off an energy source you inherently didn’t understand because you hadn’t really cracked it yet, much less stick it in a weapon. “We need at least another five years on this. If we’re lucky.”

“How long we need is not your area of expertise tonight,” McMann told him. “It’s just a demonstration.”

He felt sick. His future self felt sick. He wasn’t supposed to be on this part of the project. He didn’t even know how to shoot. 

“I didn’t want to do this,” he said guiltily to Dr. Strange.

“You were a bystander,” Dr. Strange answered. “Caught in something bigger than yourself. It happens to all of us.”

Theo could feel the weapon humming unevenly in his hands. Normally they didn’t keep it on for this long. 

“Danvers says you modified a Kree power fluctuator to make it a weapon. You’re lucky it didn’t kill you.”

“Who’s Danvers?”

“Carol Danvers,” Dr. Strange said. “Captain Marvel. She’s with us in the conference room.”

Theo remembered her. It seemed like hours ago but it was only minutes, maybe. “How does she know?”

“That engine SHIELD found and Hammer stole? She was standing next to it when it blew up.”

“Oh.” He looked down at the rifle again. “That sounds like a complicated story.”

“It is.”

“I’m better off not knowing,” Theo said, looking directly at the time in his life when knowing that aliens even existed and had ships to find was a big, cool secret that he kept for years. 

“Let’s go,” McMann said, and led him to a room they’d never been in before. Theo only had a certain level of access. But it was definitely a testing range, with bullseyes on the wall and everything. “And stay quiet. Only speak when spoken to.”

Hammer came in through the opposite door, talking in his usual bravado to some guys in suits Theo didn’t recognize at all, but one of them he would see later, on the news, when HYDRA was exposed by Captain America. 

Hammer made his speech about his custom technology. It had sounded innocuous, and Theo didn’t remember a lot of it because he was too terrified of the live weapon in his arms. The one they absolutely should not be using. The one using alien technology they didn’t really understand. G-d, he’d just wanted to be an astronaut. Maybe design the rovers that drove around Mars and took pictures and sung happy birthday to themselves. He did not want to be present for a totally illegal weapons sale.

“Nelson,” McMann said, because Hammer didn’t know his name or speak directly to him, and Theo stepped up and handed the rifle over to Justin Hammer.

“It’s not safe,” he whispered, even though he wasn’t supposed to talk. Loyalty to his employer, he supposed. And Hammer was a person. 

Hammer paused and then proceeded to completely ignore him, acting as if he hadn’t heard anything in front of the mysterious guests. 

McMann whispered to him, “There’s a dummy in the closet. Go get it.”

He was happy to be out of the room, if only for a minute. He found a fake human head and torso on a pole with wheels at the bottom. It was dressed up in a turban and a beard - which, racist - but because Theo was a huge pussy who didn’t stand up for himself, he wheeled it out anyway, pausing at the door when he heard a large blast. 

Hammer had fired into the target on the wall, leaving a considerable burn mark. He kept talking, Dr. Strange kept staring at the HYDRA agents, and Theo pushed the dummy until it was positioned in front of the target. Then McMann indicated for Theo to assist Hammer, who had his back turned to his business partners and was holding up the rifle for inspection.

Theo knew enough to turn down the dials. It was already too hot and he didn’t want to see anyone get their faces blown off. Then he gave Hammer a very hesitant thumbs up.

“Since I can’t give you a livelier demonstration at this point,” Hammer said, “I’ve had my team rig something up for you. It might be more representative of what you’re looking for.”

Hammer turned just slightly and fired. And he was a good enough shot - he did know a lot about weapons - to hit the dummy in the torso, setting it aflame but also bursting the bags of blood inside, which Theo instantaneously recognized as congealed cow blood. The dummy hadn’t been shot so much as burst.

Theo tried to look away, but the motion was too much for his unsettled stomach, and instead he threw up right on Justin Hammer’s expensive suit. Then, thankfully, he passed out.

_Present Day_

Theo awoke to clapping. Just from Stark. The others looked less amused. And he wasn't nauseous anymore. 

“For the record, I would have fired you on the spot,” Stark said. “How did you make it another day?”

“He was already gone by the time I woke up at the nurses’s station,” Theo said. “I got myself fired the next day, so maybe he didn’t have time.”

“He lacks initiative. No offense, kid.”

“I’m not a kid.”

“You did prevent a major arms deal between your employer and an international terrorist organization,” Fury said. “Your country thanks you for it.”

“Does my country know about it?” Because this place didn’t look much like a US government facility. For one thing, it was way too cool looking.

“Not really.”

With that Theo was dismissed, obviously, because he wasn’t needed for whatever important mission they were about to go on. As he didn’t like SHIELD - or whoever - looking into his brain, he felt that was for the best. Dr. Strange escorted him out, and Theo looked out the window again, at a slightly different earth because of orbit. And the moon. He could see the moon and it was incredible.

“I didn’t know sorcerers could do this,” he said. “I should have signed up for Wong’s school. But then I would basically have to be an Avenger, right? And fight people? I think everybody here knows I don’t have the stomach for it.”

“It is an immense responsibility,” Dr. Strange admitted, and not in the sneering way Tony Stark took responsibility. “It’s not for everyone.”

“Am I a coward?” he blurted out to this almost total stranger. Maybe it was that he was still in the headspace of being an employee of Hammer, where he worked on stolen alien technology that was turned into dangerous weapons. 

“Considering the authorities wouldn’t have believed you, I don’t think the whistleblower protection laws would have applied,” Dr. Strange said. “But you had the courage to leave your career behind over your morals. You were picked that night because your superiors thought you were a coward, but you proved them wrong.”

“I’m seriously telling everyone I went to space though.”

“They won’t believe you. But in the end that doesn’t matter much, does it?” Dr. Strange put a hand on his shoulder and opened a portal with the other one. “And not being part of a secret society that destroys your personal life, you have a lot of people to tell.”

“Tell SHIELD to stay away from my boyfriend. He doesn’t get involved in their shit so they shouldn’t get involved in his shit. Or I’ll ... tell everyone about the secret alien space station you guys are using for a base.”

“It’s a space _ ship _ , but I see your point,” Dr. Strange said, and Theo stepped through the portal.

He was back in the shop.

As if nothing had happened.

He didn’t even debate what he was going to do next. He ran directly to the office, where he knew everyone was working late. He found them in the conference room, papers piled high on the table.. “Guess where I was today?” He waved the phone in front of Foggy’s face. “Space, motherfuckers!”

“You’re ... not lying?” Matt’s head turned slightly as he pulled the earbud out. 

“Is this ... a picture of you and Tony Stark?” Foggy said after straight-up grabbing the phone. Karen got up and peered over his shoulder to see. 

“Wow, he’s grey,” she said.

“Celebrities are always greyer in person,” Theo said, with some authority. “And smaller. He’s pretty short.”

Foggy looked at the phone, then at Matt, then back at the phone. “Okay, so I’m looking at my brother and Tony Stark standing in front of - well, that’s pretty clearly planet earth.”

“And you can see the moon in the next shot!” Theo swiped the screen for Foggy. “I don’t have a good camera and I definitely was not supposed to be taking pictures, so the quality is shitty. But yeah, space. I was in fucking space!”

“You’re an astronaut,” Matt said. “I think. I don’t know what qualifies someone as an astronaut.”

“How the fuck did you get Tony Stark to take you into space?!?” Foggy was desperate to know. “Do you have another secret life I don’t know about? How many lives do you have?”

“Yeah, generally people around here are only allowed the two,” Karen said, and glared at Matt, who just shrugged. “So spill.”

Theo took the seat that was offered to him, even though he was so excited he could barely sit down. “So, uh, I’ve totally been lying all of these years when I said I never did anything interesting at Hammer.”

“I knew,” Matt said. “But it seemed rude to point that out.”

“It would have been. And it was pretty boring for a while, and then I got put on this project ... ”

_ I have a secret backstory _ , Theo thought with pride, as he told them the whole thing.

The End


End file.
